A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Learning

From time to time, I will post funny things my students have said.

"Miss Fergie, I need your help." Yes, a student actually called me Miss Fergie, as in Fergalicious.

"Miss, I've been trying to get into this story, but I can't." (It's not a story, it's a sermon.) "So that's why the main character is God.I've seen his name like 30 times."

"Miss, she love him like CANDY." -Response to Puritan poetry about a wife's love for her husband.

Teacher: I realize some of you have issues you'd like to discuss with me. If you have beef about your progress report, raise your hand, and I'll call you over to my desk to discuss."
Student: Beef? I got two pounds of beef with you.

Teacher: Draw two illustrations of imagery from your chart on Sinners in the hands of an Angry God.
Student: Is it okay to draw Satan looking like a girl from my first period? She wants to steal my boyfriend, so she's the devil.